Steam in the streets of Milwaukee

Hell no, I am not talking about Harleys or even any motorcycles, just good ol bicycles. I mean critical mass, fixed gear, ten speed, chrome bags, just thinking of it all makes me hot.

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Published December 14, 2006 by OnMilwaukee.com
By nickwhole

Ok. Let me just say phew. Is it hot outside or what? What? Its December you say. Oh no, its just those bikers flying by, aerating a warm breeze. Hell no, I am not talking about Harleys or even any motorcycles, just good ol bicycles. I mean critical mass, fixed gear, ten speed, chrome bags, just thinking of it all makes me hot.

Its true, if you ride a bike, and you are a male, you are bound and determined to be steamy. I dont know what it is. It could be the rolled up pant legs, or the fun striped socks you see underneath. It could be the beads of sweat that make their foreheads glisten. It could even just be those damn calve muscles that throb as they pedal down North Ave.

May I say, a great thank you to those who placed those ever so pleasant bike lanes out front of my house. It is like a path of greatness, ever so filled with beauty, every time I step out of my door. The citys done good with those 65 miles of painted lines. Maybe that steaminess is found in the fact that you join races with names like the Dahmer Dash, and tough it out on a bike on the streets of Milwaukee on December 2nd. Come on, a ride in the life of Jeffery Dahmer, from the hospital he was born in, to the hotels and bars that he took victims and hung out, even to his apartment and the courthouse he was convicted at. Who other than these steamy males would have the guts and excitement to do a thing like this? It just makes a girl feel like shes surrounded by strong men. Even though they may be peeing their pants at the thought of Jeffery Dahmer, they are still manly. Not only does this make them so gutsy, but think about how ballsy they are cutting in and out of cars, whether they be riding to class, zooming to work at the organic food store, coffee shop, or even bike shop. They can be delivering important messages or even just concert tickets from one company to another. Not only are these boys looking good, but they are doing good. Its progressive, its environmentally conscious, it is a way of life.

These boys and girls (Dont worry I have not forgotten about all those girls out there riding bikes, but they are just not the ones in my line of vision right now. ) are doing more things that are unseen to most. For instance, there is a Milwaukee Bike Collective. A volunteer bicycle resource center that builds and fixes bikes for kids, in turn for hours of work on their own bikes as well as another to be sold. So may I say thank you to all the good you bikers are doing, not only for the community but also for me.